1400 Books

Dearest blog readers, today I am posting something interesting and exciting for everyone to do, especially the book worms that have the desire to share some of their books with others in need.

Recently I have found about a very thoughtful initiative by some youth to help the IDPs in sharyar camp in Kurdistan region. This initiative is called “1400 books”. It is carried out by a group of thoughtful, active and energetic students who went through an exchange program in the US of America for 4 weeks. To be part of an exchange program and to be taught how to implement successful projects in the society is a step toward a bright future for the youth and the country.

Many programs such as ILEP, MEPI, and SUSI are the cause of bringing out productive capacities of youth to the light. Its essential to mention that these exchange programs are really important and useful as they widen the horizon of the youth and push them toward social activities to build a health and productive society. i have also been one of those youth and got the chance to become a "MEPI" girl. those programs focus on leadership programs and bringing out the best inside the youth,.pushing them to work and implement project when they go back to their homeland. Many of the youth implement successful projects and activities and one of these activities which attracted my attention was the "1400 Books" maybe because i am a book worm or maybe because it was a new idea to be implemented in the country. 

The youth who took this initiative are alumnus of “ILEP” program. According to the founder of this project (Thames alyas) if:

99 IYLEPers could donate 2 Books then there will be  (198) ‪Books

and if 99 IYLEPers asked 2 Friends to donate books there will be (198) Friends

and if those (198) Friends donated 2 Books each, there will be (396) Books, therefore the equation is:

99 IYLEPers X 2 Friends of Friends = (396) Friends of Friends

(396) Friends of Friends X 2 Books = (792) Books

So now we have 198+396+792= 1386 Books

and by adding 14 more books  the total becomes 1400 Books.

photo: Google 

If you are a book lover and you have some to donate then do not hesitate to contact them and help those who are in need to books you keeping on your shelf. To give you an idea, most of the people in the camps have lots of free time and they need some activities and something interesting to fill them their time. They are not like regularly people who can access internet at any time and go out anywhere they want. Therefore, giving them a book from your collection will be a great input in helping them and putting a smile on their face.  If you are interested in donating a book contact me to put you in touch with the focal points. This campaign will continue until 15^th of September therefore hurry up and check your collection to choose a book and make someone smile.

Note, religious books are not accepted.

Yala, we all have at least a book to donate. 

Lessons I Learnt Behind the Bars

The night before the training, I couldn't sleep. I was waking up every 30 or 45 minutes thinking of tomorrow. I was excited for this new and unique experience yet I was very worried as well. I was wondering if I am doing the right thing, asking myself is it safe to go to a prison full of criminals. I was telling myself “Huda, what if one of them attacked you. Why would you put yourself in such a position?” After all it’s a risk. What if they did not like me and instead hated me. After all they are in prison and an outsider for them is someone who will show off and only give them advices which they hate. In the morning woke up and I prepared myself and I wore no make-up and wore the longest shirt I have to cover all my body, hair up and revised some of my notes.  I have to be honest, I was afraid as well but never told my parents or my loved ones. Instead I was telling them Fshya, everything will be fine and nothing serious will happen.Went in, heart beats fastened. As they were coming into the hall one by one I was avoiding looking into their eyes. I was a bit worried. Later after 30 minutes it was the moment I had to open my mouth with a smile and start talking. At the beginning it was difficult for them to interact with me and the other trainer and this is very normal as we face this in almost all the trainings. Later, they started to be more open. For my surprise only two hours after we started and during the break, two of the youth came to me and telling me that they will be out very soon and they want to do trainings for other youth outside. I was not surprised but shocked, Couldn't be happier in my life than I was in that moment .

"Preparation for the HIV session"

 Most of them learned a lesson from the reformatory prison, and some of them grew there. Some were there since 11 years old; I asked myself what an 11 years old boy knows about crimes, bad things and consequences? I am very sure only if they were directed right they would have been very normal kids. During lunch me and my co-trainer friend decided to eat with the prisoner (crazy and risky) I know that very well. There, we wanted to know their stories and how they end up here. Each had their own story, through that I found out that they are never bad people. At all. But their circumstances were bad. Most of the troubles they went through and most of the crimes they were convicted to were a result of their families. Some were spoiled more than necessary and others were neglected. Each one them has a very pure soul and I would never say they are criminals any more because they are good people but their actions were bad due to the circumstances and situations they went through. I spent four days with a group of boys who taught me a lot. Indirectly they taught me I could be in there place if I want lucky . Anyone of us could be in their place but we are luckier in terms of our families and the people we are surrounded by. Not all of them is there because they did something wrong, actually some are there because they refused wrong things. One of the stories that broke my heart was (A.B.L) story. He was rarely smiling. Not looking into my eyes as I was explaining the topics. He was avoiding group work. He was simply broken. Therefore, I wanted to know more about him, like others was a normal boy and working to help his family. Once his boss at work wanted to sexually abuse him, and because he didn't want to be abused, he defended himself and unfortunately killed his boss at age 13). I can't put myself in his shoe and know how exactly he feels. I know what he is going through is the hardest thing one can ever go through. 

After this experience I am looking at life even more differently and I am more grateful for what I have. If those innocent youth had the same privileges I enjoyed they wouldn't be there but here outside enjoying life. I am leaving the reformatory but my heart stays there with them. They are not criminals; I won’t accept anyone to say that in front of me. They are actually the victims of their families and the way they were raised. 

Peer Education training was always and will always be a very good way to approach the youth's thoughts and feelings. I am proud, very happy for what I and my co-trainer Zhila xan did to help those good souls behind the bars. I shouldn't forget the the one who was working on the agenda  days and nights far from Kurdistan just to make the training very well designed and productive as much as possible"Sazan". I know we succeeded through their feedbacks. one wrote "I wish this training last for 365 days". This short sentence says it all and I made to forget my sleepless nights and the tiring days. 

An evaluation paper from one of the youth says " I wish this training was for 365 days" and "I like everyone to be like you"

it was defiantly worth it, an experience I wont regret and will do my best to repeat it. They never attacked, disrespected me, or even give me a bad look. They weren't monsters to eat me. They were normal teenagers and they were much much better than I have ever expected.  All what they need is a second chance in life and I believe it not hard to give them that chance. I shall Thank them for all the lessons they taught me. who knows maybe one of them one days will read this blog.  

"One of the activities to teach them cooperation ,working together and helping each other"

A breath, a tear, and a dream

Do you know that special type of inhaling breath? The one you inhale it very deep and keep it for as long as you can while you are thinking? No no, not the one you take while exercising yoga or when you swim.  The one you inhale the biggest wish you have with it? The type of breath you don’t want to release and prison inside your chest? The one that is filled with hopes and big wishes. I take that breath every day and when I release it I smile with a special tear.

What about that type of tear you want to release but you can’t and some times you don’t want to release. That special type of tear, not the sad tear or the one you have when you are at the peak of your happy moments.  The kind of tear you keep and save and promise you won’t spill until it’s the right time to do so. The tear which gives your brain a thunderbolt with a pain you endure just to keep it. The hardest type of tear you keep and you feel your throat will explode if you don’t release it. The kind when you think your heart will come out of your chest if you don’t spill it, yet you keep it. Yes, you keep it. You keep it, for that special dream, the one you are waiting for it to come true.

What about that special dream you have. Your biggest dream, do you have one? That dream is very different and precious. It’s not finding the best job, nor finding the love of your life. It’s neither finishing studying nor having a fancy life or go on a trip to a place you always wanted, but it’s much much bigger. It’s a dream that might make you the most selfish one for wanting it more than anything else and more than anyone on this planet. It’s a dream you would give up everything for it. A dream you are ready to sacrifice your life for it just to make it come true. I wonder if you have such a dream, because I have one. I don’t dream it only at night, but during my days, my sleep and when I am awake.

My most loyal reader, that breath I inhale only when I think of my first love, my beloved one, and my pride. I have promised myself to not shed that tear until I hear my love’s name called out and recognized by everyone. When everyone, every person on this planet know who is my love. I will keep shedding those tears until my biggest dream comes true. Until I shout out “Look, world, people, and nations, my love, my first love is independent” Kurdistan is independent.

Yes, my biggest and most precious dream is to see my beautiful Kurdistan independent. only then I can die in peace.

Yes, I am keeping my tears everyday “I am not exaggerating”. I am keeping them, giving me all that pain in my brain and my throat. I am saving them for the day I see my land independent then I shed them with pride.

Yes, I will keep inhaling that special type of breath every day and imagine myself one day crying and shouting “I am from the independent Kurdistan”.

My love, I am saving my tears until you come true.

Come true soon, because my I don’t know until when my heart will take it.

Painting done by:Asuda rwandizi 

It's ok if I fail !

My dearest blog followers, it's another peace of writing I am sharing with you. Lately,  i have been thinking alot specially after i graduated. Finding a good job and study MA degree became another goal to achive. "I am on the right track and I am achiving alot in short time "this is what I am telling myself, yet that doubty feeling comes and tries to concur my soul and make me wonder if I am doing the right thing.  Am I on the right path ? What if this right path is not right after all and I am being misdirected by my thoughts,emotion and imaginations?
What If I regret the decisions I am making later ? What if I fail and I fall into a halo ?many what ifs come to my mind.
Here I sit and i look at the sky listening to some noisy crockroaches chatting everywhere among the trees with their noisy  sounds in the farm while i still wonder am I on the right path ?while, hiding from everything and everyone and trying to understand if the decisions we make are right I realise  there is no right decision until you take the risk. One can never know how tomorrow will be and what will be waiting for us at the end of the tunel unless we try. I am realising even if I fail I shouldn't regret it. At least then i won't blame anyone for it and she'd tears of regret and sorrow.

I am realizing, one should always be the master of their own life. Making decisions, taking risks and do what you believe its right and step toward success. One should not fear failing but should fear not standing again.
I will give you a small advice:
A failure comes because of your decision is better than a failure you were forced to go through it.
Therefore, take the risk, make up your mind and set your priorities to achive you goal and if by chance you didn't achive the success you expect it, then try again because it's OK if you fail.

Love Inboxes

My lovely blog reader and follower. It was exactly 8:00 in the morning when i suddenly decided to write this blog and share it with you now. Something that puts a wide smile on my face and it makes me excited as well as more grateful.
Didn't they say love takes you up to the clouds and makes you happy? I tell you it does. I am getting love inboxes on my Facebook account. Inboxes that make me jump out of my seat and push me to shout out loud and say YESSSSS. Inboxes that give me butterflies. Inboxes that make me drop some tears out of happiness and tell myself you are such a lucky girl huda to live and witness this. I tell myself "You are lucky to receive all these love messages".
My dear reader,  do you know when I get those inboxes I hold my phone tight close to my chest and I say Alhamdulilah "Thanks God" for what am receiving. I know, I Know... you desperately want to know who is the lucky one who made me this happy and even pushed me to write this and share it with the public. The one who is inboxing me with love messages is not a secret admire or a crush. Neither a boyfriend or a lover. No No, it's someone "How can I say it !!!! That person owns a huge heart and simply decided to share all the goodness and love with this world through an inbox.

picture from Google

I shall tell my secret now, I actually  receive my love inboxes from mostly anonymous people and other times from people whom I know.  I am sure you are wondering what do they send me to make me this happy. They send love,care and they share. They share some of what they have with people who need it through me or through someone like me. Those love inboxes are generally donations from amazing people who want to help those in need.  They share Money, clothes, things they don't use anymore to help those who need them. When I ask for help,for some donations and I post it on Facebook. My post gets the fewest likes ever and zero comments mostly.  While I see heart notification on my inbox bottom.  Sometimes I don't know them, they contact me, send me their information and simply donate with what they can.  They trust the good in me tho most of them don't know me yet they simply decide to send me a love inbox to share it with those who need more love.
What do you think now ?? Isn't my love inbox story worth sharing ?  I am lucky to get those love inboxes right!!
Thank you for the love you are sending me, I am receiving it with appropriation and sharing it with those who need it the most.
Have a good day

Don't Compalin and Enjoy Life

 

Dearest blog reader, I know it's been ages since I wrote something and upload it here. Let me share a small secret, I never stopped writing but I stopped sharing. I shall share more this summer. An exciting news to share is "I finally graduated" no more deadlines and homework (well at least for a while). So, a new journey is about to start. When students graduate they are full of hopes to find a scholarship or an outstanding job they have always dreamed of. Well that is very normal,yet if they couldn't find that shouldn't be the end of the world and one should not stop trying until mission is accomplished.  We complain about every single problem we face and we have the habit of blaming others. Few days ago I thought with myself why do not we try to appreciate the little things we have.
Yala come with me and let's imagine some stuff.

If we have not found a good job yet, we shall enjoy this free time. No responsibilities,not even studying. Why not reading, writing, painting, going out with friends, practicing a hobby that you pushed aside because of studying,spending more time with your family, do some volunteering or something you have always wanted to do but never had enough time for it because of classes. Belive me later you will wish for some free time that you cannot get because of working.
Something else that we faced awhile ago is shortage in petrol. All what we did was directly complaining and blaming others. So i say why do not we use cars less than usual and try to walk a bit more. (Don't tell me it's hot and the weather is not helping,I won't buy that) if you want to do it then you will no matter what. I do that, for places with long distances I drive and I walk most of the time when there is no need for car. What about electricity?   I remember last month we faced some problems with electricity. I seriously loved the fact there was no electricity  (call me crazy,mad or sick, it's ok) I actually enjoyed my nights without electricity.  I started to notice the stars and the moon again. In the crowded cities one forgets that stars and moon still exist.These are very little examples that I personally try to find some joy in them. I turn complaining about these little things to appropriation.  Some might say , she is too dreamy or she enjoys imagining. You are right I  actually do, but through this I learned how to appreciate the little things and instead of complaining I look for the nice things in them.
Let's try to find the little joy in the things we usually complain about and you will see that life is not that bad after all.

A Cold but Warm December

My beautiful and amazing blog readers, i know it’s been more than 6 months and i did not write you something. I am being a bit selfish for not sharing what i always write; therefore I don't dare to ask for forgiveness. I still wanted to share this piece of writing with you. 
While i was sitting with my family members in front of the heater having some oranges, i read a little piece of information that reminded me of a little girl's fear in the past few years.  
That little information said “if humans want to success and they are afraid of failure they should concentrate more on success and direct their thoughts toward how to maximize the chances of success rather than focusing on their fear of falling". 
This little information reminded me of a girl that used to hate December and cold weather. There was a reason for that negative feeling she had for this month. Most of the people love it. It’s the season of Christmas and exchanging beautiful gifts. It’s the season of love, family gathering, celebrations and more love. It was different with her, for reason or no reason she used to cry a lot in December. She tended to be sad and a bit down.  I wondered why this little girl always hated December !!!, and through that peace of information I found out the reason. It was simply because she was concentrating more on her fear rather than focusing on the enormous joys of this beautiful month. 
That little girl feared loneliness because she had a fearful thought that cold weather will make her loved people cold and this will make her heart cold in return. luckily she changed, she is no more afraid now, because she found out that her loved ones will not be cold with the cold weather but with love they will keep each other warm. Her heart won’t turn cold not even for a second. Actually it won’t be warm as well but on fire and she will warm others with her beautiful feelings. 
She is now concentrating more on these beautiful ideas and feelings rather than her fear of loneliness. This December is different and the coming Decembers will be even more different. Now it’s not her choice to feel that way, because she is surrounded by amazing, brilliant and special lovely people who will force her gently to be happier and they won’t leave her a room to fear loneliness. 
If you fear something like that little girl had, STOP focusing on it and look at the beautiful things and maximize your chance of surviving in this life.
These are some thoughts of this Cold but warm December i had this year.